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Best Ways to Deal With Self-Doubt

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Best Ways to Deal With Self-Doubt

Self-doubt is an issue that a lot of us face. We don’t always need external factors to generate stress for us, we often do it ourselves. I have talked about how we give rise to self-doubt by comparing our journey to other people’s among other reasons. Today, I have Ellen Tran from ZyraKuma to tell you guys about the best ways to deal with self-doubt. Here’s what she has to say- 

Have you ever felt like you’re just not good enough? Or you just want to run away from “fear of failure”? It’s ok! People deal with self-doubt plenty of times because it’s just a human thing we suffer from day to day.

The term “self-doubt” revolves around the mental state of feeling uncertainty or distrust within oneself (a.k.a. you). In easier terms, the feeling of rejection (“fear of failure”). A lack of low self-esteem delaying a certain action because you think you are “not good enough” for that certain thing based on lack of evidence.

Here’s an example of self-doubt: pretend you have a job in any creative industry. You’re about to do a presentation in like 15 minutes, and you’re all prepared. But at the last minute, your anxious mind is telling you all these negative thoughts like “I can’t do this!” “What if I end up embarrassing myself?” “What if no one likes my work?”. You’re there standing in a daze where you’re doubting your success and wanting to escape.

If you’re in a similar situation, don’t feel discouraged! Here are ways to deal with self-doubt.

1. Talk to a Close Family Member or Friend

Best Ways to Deal With Self-Doubt

It’s always good to talk to someone you trust who can be empathetic and non-judgemental (I’m probably talking about a therapist), but you can always talk to a trusted friend or a family member. 

Back then, I was at my lowest of lows after being rejected from job applications after job applications. I talked to one of my closest friends, and they helped cheer me up after that whole incident. So if you know your “go-to” person, just straight up throw words at their faces and tell them your thoughts and feelings even if it ends up with you throwing a fit or being overly emotional.

2. Write in a Journal

Best Ways to Deal With Self-Doubt

If you’re the type who is afraid of expressing their self-doubt to someone else, then you can always try journaling because no journal will ever judge you.

I can feel that way sometimes too. Some days, I don’t feel like talking to someone about my rejections, so I go to my diary instead. You can always write about anything that comes to your mind and what’s giving you self-doubt. Journaling helps you release a few emotions and gives you a clearer mind to the barrier that’s stopping you.

A suggestion that journaling can help you overcome your self-doubt is to figure out your problem-focused (how you can attempt to change the situation) or emotion-focused (how you can attempt to change the thoughts or emotional consequences of the doubt) triggers. This can work out if you’re in a stressful situation too.

And note, you DON’T have to go out of your way to buy yourself a journal. You can always use your phone’s note app to do that. But writing by hand is preferable, it helps you feel more connected.

3. Motivational Thinking

Best Ways to Deal With Self-Doubt

It could be a motivational video on YouTube or a podcast. There are also motivational quotes that you can write in your journal or stick a sticky note where you often see it (like a mirror or bathroom door, for example).

Give yourself motivation. Tell yourself “I can do this” or “I know I can do this”. The more positive reinforcement you give yourself the more your mind will do what you’re telling it to do.

I do this a few times before a group presentation or before a test. I tell myself “Just get this over and done with!” or “Do it for the credits. Just do it for the credits!”. Sometimes it works, and other times it doesn’t, but it doesn’t matter once you get it over and done with, right?

4. You Have Other Chances

Best Ways to Deal With Self-Doubt

One true realization I had recently was after my first test for my unit. I’m not afraid to share my score here so I’ll just say it. I got a 19/30. Was I disappointed? Yes. If I had scored another point, I would have been happy. 

Then my professor said to everyone in the class “If you guys scored a 23/30, you would have graduated as a psychologist” or something like that. That made me self-doubt about graduating a bachelor’s degree in Psychology. The whole day, I thought to myself that I’m going to be another failed drop-out with no degree and fall into a lot of debt.

But the thing is, that test only results in 10% of my credits. Why worry about something that little when you can always find another way?

People say “Learn from your mistakes,” and that’s what I’m telling you. People make mistakes for a reason, and that reason is to learn and use it to climb to success. Did JK Rowling give up when she couldn’t find a publisher to publish her “Harry Potter” novel? No, she didn’t! Now it’s one of the most popular novels worldwide and has made Rowling a billionaire.

If it’s a dream that you want to accomplish, you should never give up unless you know that you feel that it’s impossible to achieve it. Balance the optimistic and pessimistic thoughts. This is also a reminder for you to practice better for the next time (a.k.a. don’t be like me and fall asleep at 4 am before a test day).

5. Change Your Mindset 

Has this happened in the past? If so, look at the patterns and look at what it’s doing to you. You shouldn’t fall back into this self-doubt trap again, and adopting a positive mindset helps with that.

These traps are known as “faulty thoughts”. These include:

  • overgeneralization (categorizing those as a never-ending negative cycle), 
  • overlooking the positives (bias towards the negatives than the positives), 
  • definite statements (believing in great expectations), 
  • blaming other factors (targeting other reasons for your failure),
  • categorization/labeling (another way of looking at things in black-and-white), 
  • emotional reasoning (using your feelings as facts and basing it on your decisions or actions), 
  • exaggeration (overlooking the “other side” or someone/something and extending more of the good qualities), 
  • predicting the future (predicting the negative event or situation), 
  • mind-reading (thinking something negative based on their reaction or attitude) and
  • mentally filtering occasions (overlooking the positive and focusing more on the negative details). 

You can read more about these in detail here.

Ph.D., Karyl McBride states “You don’t need to brag, but give yourself credit where credit is due,” and I couldn’t agree on enough. She also exclaims about narcissism and being stuck in the “imposter syndrome.”

This is where you feel like you can’t accept accomplishment, knowing that you might feel like a complete “fraud”. If you do feel like you have imposter syndrome, tell yourself “If it’s something to be seen as worthy of a celebration, then celebrate it! Only I can give myself credit”. 

These are some of the best ways you can overcome self-doubt about yourself.

Author: Ellen Tran @ZyraKuma
Site: https://www.zyrakuma.com
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Mindfulness

Why Do Animals Make Better Friends Than Humans?

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Animals are the pure, raw souls that need little to be genuinely happy. In a world continually chasing after materialistic bliss and happiness, your furry friends find fulfillment in a bit of touch, a bit of affection, and a dollop of kindness. 

There are no layers or hidden agendas, it’s just a beautiful bond of simplicity, or as popularly known as love. Somehow, for this generation, the meaning of the word love has been lost in translation. We are always after something, something better, something newer. 

Our fast-paced approach has derailed basic human emotions and its purity. Friendships for many people is less of a bond, and more of an unsigned “give and take” policy. However, if you look into your dog’s crystal-clear eyes, nothing but love and deep affection reflect back. 

pets

That’s the beauty of building relations with animals; they want nothing but some warmth and your time. It’s a sense of fulfillment that makes you believe that being you is enough, along with an odd satisfying sense of acceptance when your four-legged buddy comes running up like there is no tomorrow.

Like a true friend, they listen to you and give you comfort in the most unprecedented ways. We may not share the same language, but some words can be understood even when unspoken. 

We all look for hope and belief to be alive. Sometimes, it just needs a kind pair of eyes to stare at you with honest attention, without any judgment, to find that hope. I also believe honesty is a magically powerful language found in abundance in our furry friends.

But this is not only about pets; all animals in this world have something profound to offer. Their sense of affection, love, and gratitude is like a lighthouse in a deep dark sea. 

All around the globe, you can find various instances of animals and their bonds with fellow humans developing in unimaginable ways, simply because of their beautiful, unspoiled souls. They are more precious than us, I think, by being able to portray love in the most natural and pure way. 

If you have found it, always hold on to this feeling, because it is fulfilling and heart-touching to witness true love in their eyes, and eyes are thought to be the window of souls. At the end of the day, we are lucky to share this world with them, because they truly teach us how to be loved in this crazy, big world. 

So try to do your part to save them and provide for them, because your act of kindness can go a long way!

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Mindfulness

The Impact of Deep Melody

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Music is a form of art that has the power to touch your soul. Through this universal language, countless emotions have been depicted over the ages. The human mind grasps music differently under different circumstances. Even the same tune can be interpreted variedly from person to person. 

From Beethoven to Bach, Mozart to Yo Yo Ma, Einaudi to Mischka, the depth of soulful music is beyond the power of perception. The music created by these artists resonates deep within our souls through every note, every beat. 

If you close your eyes and listen to Yo Yo Ma’s rendition of the Prelude, irrespective of your mood, you will get absorbed into a moment of tranquil hard to describe in words. Or take, for example, Einaudi’s composition called “Waterways,” the sense of a pristine aura that lasts long after he finishes the piece, is simply beautiful.

Every note, chord, and tune affects your brain in a way you can’t even imagine. So here, we will try to explore some of the powers of music and the impacts of deep melodies.

Memory 

Since the 20th century numerous studies have been conducted to research the power of music over memory functioning of the human brain. Certain music can take your mind back decades in an instant. 

In a study conducted with dementia patients, it was found that music improves general well being, mood, orientation, and episodic memory recalls. It was shown to have an overall positive effect on life.

Stress Relief

Music can lower the cortisol levels in your body and can alleviate the symptoms of stress. 

According to the American Psychological Society, “In a trial conducted by University of Alberta, with 42 children aged between 3-11, it was found that while getting an IV inserted, patients who listened to relaxing music reported significantly less pain, and some demonstrated significantly less distress, compared with patients who did not listen to music.”

Alleviation of Pain 

Martin Luther King had famously said, “My heart, which is so full to overflowing, has often been solaced and refreshed by music when sick and weary.”

This statement, in fact, is quite true to an extent, as researchers now believe that listening to music triggers the release of opioids in our body. The same chemical comes into action when the body is in pain, acting as a natural antidote.  

Seizures

Christine Charyton, of the Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center, said that “Persons with epilepsy synchronize before a seizure. By listening to music, many patients reported that they felt relaxed.” 

Concluding Words

Music has the power to heal. It reaches the deepest corners of our soul and affects us in unprecedented ways. However, the depth of melody is without any boundaries of prefixed notes and scales. It is an eternal journey of understanding and perception beyond our senses.

“Music… will help dissolve your perplexities and purify your character and sensibilities, and in time of care and sorrow, will keep a fountain of joy alive in you.” ― Dietrich Bonhoeffer

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Health

4 Benefits of Doing Yoga Regularly

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Yoga is an excellent place to start a healthy lifestyle if your life has been quite a bit sedentary for some time. Even with health conditions like arthritis or osteoporosis, you can safely practice Yoga. With multiple types and forms of Yoga to choose from, you have the freedom to practice whatever suits you. Regular Yoga can help you become more robust and flexible by making it easier for you to do other exercises like dancing, walking, or swimming.

Moreover, it is also a great way to stay energetic and flexible. Your general alertness increases, and there is also a profound positive impact on mental health with Yoga. 

With regular practice, you will gradually notice overall well-being and a deep sense of inner peace. Yoga frees you of all the worry, stress, anxiety that bogs you down and lets you proceed towards a more holistic and spiritually fulfilling self-development.

Let’s take a look at four of the obvious benefits that come from practicing Yoga.

Cardiovascular

  • Improves poor blood circulation
  • Reduces high blood pressure
  • Reduces oxidative stress
  • Reduces body-wide inflammation, contributing to healthier hearts

Orthopedic

  • Improves mobility in people with lower back pain
  • Reduces risk for injury
  • Allows better coping with arthritis
  • Can slow down the advent of osteoporosis
  • Improves the condition of people with limited mobility

Stress-Anxiety-Depression

  • Reduces headaches
  • Helps you to have better control over tension or stress
  • Reduces anxiety levels and depression
  • Can help you get better sleep, improves insomnia
  • Relaxes your body
  • Increases overall mental and physical stability

Lung

  • Improves breathing patterns
  • Increases lung capacity
  • Improves lung output and pulse rates
  • Helps people with asthma, to control definitive symptoms

Final Comments

Yoga is an excellent way to heal your body, both physically and mentally. It allows you to have the perfect blend of de-stressing and exercise in a simple yet effective way.

A healthy body makes a healthy mind. Regular Yoga can help you achieve health and fitness. Moreover, daily practice brings in more discipline to your everyday life. Especially during these testing times of the COVID-19 pandemic, when we are all trapped in our homes, a regular fitness regime that is easy to follow is especially necessary.

The best part is that Yoga is trendy, and you can always find guidelines for the correct postures. With many materials and videos available online, you can start your fulfilling Yoga journey any moment you wish. So what’s stopping you today?

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