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Self Improvement

Why Learning to Choose the Battles You Fight is Important

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Why Learning to Choose the Battles You Fight is Important

Not all battles are worth fighting, this is something all of us know in theory, but seldom know how to practice it. There’s a thin line between not taking action because you are scared and not taking action because it is not worth it.

It is easy to convince yourself that the reason for your inaction is the knowledge that the fight isn’t worth it when, in reality, you are just scared to take the leap and vice versa.

Most of the time, when we see something wrong happening, our instinct is to right the wrong. We decide to get up and fight for the cause; we all want what’s best to happen. But, sometimes we are stopped and told to “reconsider our decision, our stance, because it may not be worth it.” But then again, we are also advised to keep trying, “because it may not show results right away, but someday it would.”

Sometimes when we are way angry about someone or something or can’t agree with the masses, we are told to calm down because, “Live peacefully, the world is already at war.”

These questions often plague our minds – Why are we told to calm down? Why are we told to let it be? Why should we pick our fights carefully?

Why Should You Be Selective of the Battles You Fight?

Why Learning to Choose the Battles You Fight is Important

The reason we are told to be selective of jumping into a fight, especially when it comes to personal relationships, is because a relationship of any kind goes on only when two people learn to enjoy their differences. Instead of lashing out on each other at every small issue, we need to learn to respect each other’s boundaries. What matters to you might not make sense to someone else, and what matters to them might seem illogical to you – this is where you are usually supposed to take a step back.

“Part of the happiness of life consists not in fighting battles, but in avoiding them. A masterly retreat is in itself a victory.”

-Norman Vincent Peale

Because usually, in situations like this, there is a low probability of winning, and winning isn’t everything. At the moment, it may seem like winning the argument is everything, and you may win the argument, but lose the relationship. Because winning doesn’t matter as much as you think it does, people do. 

Which is why, you need to be selective in your battles, sometimes peace is better than being right. I have always chosen peace. This choice wasn’t my first always. I would jump at the opportunity of proving myself right, but then slowly, I realized not only was I straining my relationships, but also was hammering away at my own peace. When this realization dawns on you, you realize how futile the need to win was, and you start choosing peace.

“The foolish race of mankind are swarming below in the night; they shriek and rage and quarrel — and all of them are right.”

-Heinrich Heine

Sometimes staying calm and not giving in to the anger can help with the situation more than trying to diffuse it with words ever would. Because in the heat of the moment, words can be easily lost in translation and can be perceived as something they weren’t supposed to be. That being said, speak up when it’s necessary, not when it would simply lead to an insignificant argument. 

When and Why Should You Walk Away?

Why Learning to Choose the Battles You Fight is Important

“I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig, you get dirty; and besides, the pig likes it.”

-George Bernard Shaw

Some people love baiting other people to get a reaction out of them. These people are usually attention seekers; they like the attention being on them. For that, they will rope in anyone. You may even be forced to participate in a fight you don’t even care about. But, because they have riled you enough, you don’t stand back. Don’t engage in the futile exercise, instead say, “Yes okay, you win” and walk away. They are looking for an argument most of the time, and they want to get a reaction out of you; don’t give in, you simply don’t play their game.

“Sometimes you win by walking away.” 

Because you are not giving them what they wanted, you walking away is going to piss them as well. There’s no making them happy. You need to understand that it’s their own struggle, you don’t need to be a part of that. You don’t need to entertain the needs of such people. This is why it is also important to cut toxic people out of your life.

“Whenever we want to combat our enemies, first and foremost we must start by understanding them rather than exaggerating their motives.”

-Criss Jami

YOU are your biggest opponent. Fight yourself every day, to improve the quality of the life you lead, to achieve what you want. Live life on your own terms and stop justifying yourself to everybody – you don’t owe anyone, anything. Our biggest flaw is that we are never really confident about ourselves; we are never sure about our capabilities. Our inadequacy is the reason we compete, and it is the reason we get angry, jealous. 

Final Thoughts

There aren’t a lot of battles worth fighting – when there is something really wrong happening; either your friend is in trouble, or someone is being mistreated – that is when you are actually supposed to take a stand. 

“Pick the right battle and win the war.”

Petty fights don’t deserve your attention, nor do they deserve a reaction. They only make a mess and leave scars. Not everything is worth flipping out over – very few things in life are. 

Learn to stay calm and composed – it won’t be easy, but it will be worth it. Talking less or not fighting doesn’t make you a coward; it just shows that you are mature enough not to let irrational things hurt you. Don’t let people get the best of you.

Productivity

Ways to set up a Home Office

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home business

Day 1: ‘I am feeling lethargic today, maybe I’ll take rest for a while and resume after a few hours’

Day 2: ‘Don’t feel like working today’

Day 3:  ‘Work from home is not productive at all! It was better when we could function in office’

Have you been experiencing this for the last few months? 

Work from home can get boring and unproductive real quick and with changing times, this could be something companies resort to permanently.

So what’s the solution to not lose your work drive and keep working to your contentment?

Why not change your home workspace into a professional setting that gives you somewhat similar vibes as your in-office environment!

Wondering how?

Well, read on! 

To transform a small part of your house can be tedious but if the thought of strategically, can complement it well enough.

First things first – visualize how office spaces are built, most importantly the area where you used to sit in for hours and hours.

Got an idea? Now all you have to do is structure that into a smaller carpet area.

Decide on a location thereafter – where in the house do you want to set up your office. Make sure to be very particular when considering this because this has a major role in determining work focus and concentration. A corner, an entire room or just dividing the room into workspace and home is all to you and your comfort.

Usually, it is recommended to be in a remote area (like away from the kitchen) so to block any unnecessary noise.

Another thing to be cautious about is the amount of light that your chosen location has. With no proper lighting, the strain will increase and you might find it difficult to keep going.

What do companies do after building the space? 

They settle on what furniture and equipment will be required to commence the activity.

Similarly, select your desk and chair wisely. You will want to need a chair that isn’t too hard nor is it too soft.

Too hard could make your back hurt and too soft can cause you to sit in a wrong position that’ll ultimately result in a backache. Ideally, a rolling chair is recommended because it’ll give you movement and comfort at the same time.

Coming to the size of your desk, it depends on if you want a longer one or a short desk would suffice. However, make sure that the workplace doesn’t look and feel too clustered because then your efficiency is what can be affected. Along with the size of the desk, it’s shaping also is equally significant. L-shaped, T-shaped or U-shaped or any other shape, that will look chic and be the perfect match to your location – judge appropriately.

While you are at it, keep in mind to place your desk in front of some view that will soothe your eyes. A pleasant scenery to look at acts as a relaxing tool for the mind and the eyes, giving you the refreshment you need during the job hours.

Have you noticed how your in-office cabin looked hassle-free and clean? That’s what exactly you want in your home office too, trust me. Wires tangled and plug loosely attached will definitely distract you and come in the way of smooth operation. So to avoid this, make sure you’ve proper connection and sockets for keeping your wires and plugs out of the way.

Moving continuously to fetch files and other important things can turn out to be time-wasting. To not lose out on productivity, you could have cabinets and drawers made around your desk or within the same area as is your workspace.

The office is not about just desk-work. There are visits and meetings and conferences too. Therefore, having an area dedicated to client meetings is necessary. Though if you feel that this is something that can be done without, it’s entirely your call.

Sitting in one place for about 8-9 hours every day can be monotonous. What can be worse is when the same to you sit in is bland and plain – just like a hospital ward. I am sure you don’t like that and certainly wouldn’t want your workplace to emulate the same!

Hence, decorate and paint!

Make your room look green to calm you or fill it with colors to keep you fresh, bright, and awake the entire day. If you didn’t know, colors very much influence your emotions.

Like I had mentioned before, changing interiors can be tedious but if strategically done, it can complement your home well enough. Considering that, you could design and decorate your home office according to your house and it’s color combinations. This will not only not erupt your interior but also make you feel safe and congenial making it easier for you to work.

In the end, whatever you read or see, go by what you feel is right and appropriate for your house and your surroundings. Do not place anything that isn’t required or is unnecessary and just keeps adding up your budget.

In an attempt to make your home office beautiful and classy, remember to not walk off the money line. Setting a workplace at home can be expensive but if done well within the monetary limit, you are sure to get elegant and reasonable decor.

What?

Are you still reading? 

Go!  It’s time you start planning because you never know when offices might open up and you may be required to step out of your lazy workdays.

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Habits

How Reading can impact your Day to Day Life?

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book read

Reading is a healthy habit, which, if practiced daily, can change your entire life around. Do you want to know why? Through Reading, one can not only gain knowledge but also stay acquainted with the outside as well as the inside world. The best thing about reading daily is to have an isolated place for yourself in your mind, where you can run off to. Most people don’t have the patience or intention to read, and that too, daily. Though this is a habit that takes time to settle in but trust me, once it does, you would never regret it. So, here is a list of reasons why you should read daily?

Why should you read daily?

  • To gain knowledge

Once you start reading daily, and by Reading, it can be anything – you can read few pages of a novel, or a magazine, or newspaper, or even poetry – you would notice within weeks how much your knowledge regarding the outer world has improved. Through Reading, one can have clear information regarding the current affairs, and hence, stay updated.

  • To improve your vocabulary

Through Reading, you can definitely learn new words and hence, improve your vocabulary. Most people make it a habit to learn a new word from the dictionary every day, but if you read daily, you are bound to get new words and make a list of them on a notebook with their meanings, which is definitely going to be helpful for you.

  • To have a make-believe world

The most beautiful consequence of Reading is having one’s own imaginary world, where one can live a life full of magic. This is the extraordinary superpower one acquires while reading. In this busy daily life of ours, we all look for a secluded place where we can feel the essence of peace. Reading can fly you off to the imaginary land of sunflowers, daisies, and cats who can indeed talk.

  • To become more attentive

Most people lack patience nowadays. Being impatient and restless has become a severe problem in today’s world. Here, Reading can help you calm your mind and improve your observation skills. It works like meditation. In no time, you would find your mind focusing on details and becoming more attentive to events, which used to go unnoticed.

  • To reduce stress

Reading is similar to meditation, and hence, it definitely helps to reduce your stress. Books always have a calming effect on one’s mind. It takes you away from daily problems and stressful situations and helps your mind to gain stability. Not only it helps in reducing stress, but it also helps to decrease the anxiety levels of a person. 

Everyone should make reading a daily habit. One should switch off the mobile phones, turn off the television and take some time out to read. It works wonders on one’s day-to-day life and changes one person’s entire personality. Though it can be hard at first, with time, you would cherish the moments alone, reading in a corner while your mind is flying off to Narnia.

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Productivity

The Pressure of this Epidemic: Should we take it Slow or Get your Productivity Game on

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productivity

The race has begun, the race of life doesn’t stop even during quarantine or lockdown. It still continues when an epidemic is on the loose. Students all across were expected to continue working, office resumed productivity, and homemakers had it worse as their routine doubled. 

Opening social media, flooded with images, videos and posts of people baking, drawing, learning a new instrumentlearning new wilderness survival skills and working out, seems to be filled with energy. You look and you browse and you want to be filled with those emotions as those celebrities, friends, or influencers who seem to have figured a way to keep pushing through this pandemic. You imagine and daydream about a banana bread recipe you should try or that hype around the Dalgona coffee. You feel a sense of distance and anxiety, a fear of missing out. So you try, you try to push yourself, install tik-tok, and practice a common dance routine, decide to post it to establish that you are doing something too, you aren’t just lying around. There is this common unquestioned idea that when you are free and have time on your hand you should continue working, never waste time by just sitting down, or watching a show relaxing. This notion has been instilled and we as individuals are conditioned to feel that if you aren’t doing anything in your free time you are wasting time, not getting ahead in the horse race of this world. But, in lockdown and the current situation is tiring to comprehend. A state of panic and anxiety of the future, the fear of the virus and the death tools, fear of the contention of the world around. In all this, you feel obligated to be motivated and productive. To show that you have some value attributed to yourself even during a lockdown. 

Productivity is often measured by documenting and showcases it to other people. In this day and age where social media has taken over our lives, where everyone posts their lives online to show what they are up to. It helps take your mind off things, keeps you engaged. Not everyone needs to cope with the pandemic the same way, the hustle has been romanticized by capitalist society. Where one has to keep on their toes. So many of us have received links, or advertisements to push us into starting something new. Not many people talk about how it is okay to just not do anything and take it slow. Not realizing that the conventional definition of being busy doesn’t necessarily have to be productive in nature. Our time has become monetized, every passing minute one has to do something, 

When one is taking it slow and not pushing themselves into burning out they too are being productive. This can be said because they are introspective and reflecting upon themselves. Working towards rebuilding by taking it slow, relaxing as the times are tough. Lockdowns make one feel trapped as you have no social contact. One starts to feel the need for validation and added value to themselves. This is obtained by documenting and showing their productivity on social media. The competition to show how busy you are and how you have coped with this pandemic, but in reality, many are struggling. There has been an increase in problems like insomnia, backaches, headaches, feeling nauseated, and eventually leading to burnout. With the increasing fear and uncertainty about our future, there needs to be a period to pause and retrospect. It is completely acceptable to take your time off, as that too is a form of productivity for yourself. The idea that physical work attributes to your productivity levels is a notion that makes one forget about themselves. Taking care of yourself and taking the time off thinking and just take it one day at a time. The pandemic has led to work from home bases for both students and working individuals. Hence with the effect of the pandemic and the working situation, this pressure to be productive is an added factor for them to feel demotivated and isolated further. Apart from that parents and homemakers, have been burning out and need a means to just relax and have time off for themselves away from societal pressure. 

Final Thoughts 

Social media is a great tool to feel connected to this pandemic, but with this, it also brings in the pressure of being at the same level as everyone. One starts to feel “if they can do it so can I”. The energy and exertion both mentally and physically are draining, the constant juggle, and trying to draw a line with your various social groups sitting from home. The pandemic adds extra responsibility, in terms of taking care of your family, friends neighbors thinking about your work, and how to run your home. That is why with these added pressures you can decide for yourself what works best for you, being productive by following daily trends help you relax and cope with the situation then that is great. On the contrary, if you feel drained and are feeling extinguished from the pressure, then it is best to take it slow, relax as thinking, and working on yourself is a form of work too.

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